Sentimental Saturday:) Smiling, Crying, Singing, Dying

6 Dec

“The worst part of holding the memories is not the pain. It’s the loneliness of it. Memories need to be shared.” ― Lois Lowry, The Giver

******************* 

 
December 5, 1970, forty five years ago, was one of the best days of my life, now it’s an excruciatingly painful memory. It’s funny how certain dates, songs, places, and photos can stir up indescribable emotions. Actually, it isn’t funny at all! But, like the quote said, “Memories need to be shared.”

  
December 5, I went on a blind date with a sixteen year old boy named Tony. We fell in love and were inseparable. My first love, and I thought my till death do us part love. He proposed on December 5, 1974 and  we were married in 1975 and celebrated our “un-anniversary” every December 5th for forty-two years. We worked hard, raised two wonderful sons, and had a great life. So, at least I thought so. 

Fast forward forty-five years later…The abridged version…we got divorced last year and he’s shacked up with the slut waitress from his country club. He lied, cheated, and betrayed the woman who loved him unconditionally. I was blind-sided, broken for a long time, and still trying to pick up the pieces. So, needless to say, this day brings up sad painful memories. There was some serious crying today. 

NOW, for the smiling part. I wiped away the tears and was determined to have a wonderful day. I started out early this morning and went over to the Toys for Tots Motorcycle Run to visit with my friends David and Karen Marks who help coordinate and organize this annual event. Hundreds of bikers bring toys and donations for the annual Marine sponsored event. 

  
Karen Marks always has a big smile and hug for me. She has sons in the Marines, so this is a labor of love and dear to her heart.

  
David Marks, on the right, was instrumental in starting this 43 mile motorcycle run and charity event

  
The young Marines were happy to pose for pictures with visitors. It was a beautiful, crisp sunny day.

   
Mr. And Mrs. Santa also support the Marines.(I believe Santa was a Marine.)

    
   
After this, I hopped into my car, cranked up the radio, and sang my way down HWY 75 to my writing group over in Allen. I love this group of ladies. Liz, Julia, and Aelle are fabulous writers and wonderful friends. We spent more time laughing and chatting then we did critiquing work. 

Back into my car, more singing to the radio,  and off to Tupps Brwery for the holiday art show and brewery tour.( I don’t drink and drive, so I didn’t  do the tour/drinking part.) I ran into dozens of friends and most of the vendors were close artist friends. I’ll share those photos another day.TMI for now.

I had a late lunch on the square with my friend Terree at the Celt Pub, walked around, visited at Sweet Spot Bakery and  then chatted with Sue over at the visitors center. I got home around 4:30 and went for a long walk. 

I try to keep busy and fill my days with friends, smiles and songs. This helps fight back the tears, fears, and sad memories. I wasn’t even going to mention the painful memories of today’s date, but it’s all part of my day…the good, the bad, and the ugly. 

But, you know what? Each day gets a little better, with more laughing than crying. 

   
 

Caramel hot chocolate whipped cream mustache and a smile. Cheers!

2 Responses to “Sentimental Saturday:) Smiling, Crying, Singing, Dying”

  1. dancingpalmtrees December 7, 2015 at 11:15 pm #

    I like your honesty. So many people fake it but you put things right on the line. Also I’m glad that like the Glady’s Knight song You’ve Made the Best of a bad Situation.

    • toniandrukaitis December 8, 2015 at 7:35 pm #

      Thank you, my friend. Gladys is a very smart woman. I think telling my story may help someone else feel empowered or optimistic. It certainly has helped me. I have been writing my blog EVERY day for almost 3 years. It helps me find the good and positive things in life to share. Sharing is caring.i also enjoy your posts very much. Have a wonderful day.

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